OOC Post

As some people may know, and some do not, I had a sort of mental melt down friday night.  I ended up deleting half of my friends' list, leaving groups, wiping out Savannah's profile, and disappeared for a few hours to calm down.  I have no words to say how sorry I am to those that I hurt, but it was a long time coming.  I have been dealing with several ooc issues in the sim that I roleplay in.  Mostly people trying to start crap between me and my partner, or some of the higher ups talking down to me.  I am saddened to think after two years in the same place, solid years with only a few days taken here and there, that I was basically told I am nothing there.  All this has been boiling under the surface for a few weeks, and it just erupted.  However, I am better now, trying to think how to patch things, wondering if some things are worth patching.  Also found out that someone I considered close to me was passing skype ims I had wrote to them around.  I get overwhelmed easily.  I have never been one to be able to deal with groups of people, ic or ooc.  And I think that added fuel to the fire.  For now, I'm on a break from the place where I rp, to get my head on straight, and do some rebuilding.  I am sorry to those that care, and those that immediately went into my ims to bash me for walking away from the rp... thanks for showing me your real side.

To those that cared, and were there to pick up the pieces and offer hugs and love, I love you, you know who you are <3

Sav

Life and Death, an endless cycle"

I grow tired.  It is unsurprising.  The city dynamics have changed, the streets, the inhabitants.  There is so little fear in town now.  I thank the goddess daily that I don't feed on emotions.  Unless I was a succubus I'd probably starve to death.  I spend a lot of time reading, watching, collecting.  Even the violence that used to be weaved in Toxia seems to be lacking unless one of the monsters show up...

Miza died.  One of the very few that I considered blood kin, and treated her as such.  I found her body in the courthouse, after smelling blood.  I didn't think about how she got there, I just was thinking, no, it can't be her.  She was all that left of my humanity when I left the Rights.  I collected her body and took off to the one person I thought could fix anything.  Jaco.  Immediately he thought I did it, of course, but once he seen how upset I was, how badly I wanted to bring her back he agreed to try and help me.  We took her body to the arena and I held it close to my own.  As if my soul could bring hers back.  Then Death came to claim her... I refused to let her go.  A deal was made, my immortality for hers.  She would live, but I had to die.  And not by my own hand...  About this time my brother walked up, the same brother who was in debt to Death for my soul.  HE had been cast on the island to kill me.  So in one motion, he destroyed me, releasing himself from debt, and bringing Miza back.  I knew it was coming this time, I was prepared.  There was no limbo, just, the sound of Hex's blade in the air, then Death dragging me to hell.

The moment we reached his lair he was upon me.  His foot dug into my spine as he gripped a wing in each hand.  "You thought you could outsmart me child?" he hissed then with a tug backwards, he ripped the wings from my back, taking away my power, my angelic immortality.  "So selfless are we?"  His tone was so cold, and sarcastic.  I found it hard to concentrate on him much, most of my focus on the pain of having my wings ripped out.  It was as if he damaged my very soul and he may have...  I said little, just making sure he made good on his part of the deal.  Once he answered affirmative, I fell silent and took what he decided for me.  When he found my soul was bound to Xion's, oh he was pissed.  He couldn't collect it, as Xion has never cheated him, and since my soul is bound to his... that much of my existence was spared.

I do not know how long I was there, could have been hours, or days.... or weeks.  He would torture me to the point of death, bring me back, then do it again.  I was a mortal stuck in hell.  In every literal and figurative sense.  Ever inch of my body was abused, every part violated.  I felt my mind twisting, trying to escape the torture, mentally at least.  It didn't work.  He knew what I was doing, so then the mental torture begin.  I just wanted him to end me.  I no longer cared about my soul, or anything.  I just wanted it to stop, and it wouldn't...

He took a break, letting one of his servants heal me when a visitor showed up.  I do not know what she came for.  I was barely able to see her, or him.  Off note, its odd I've always referenced to death as male, when in truth it shows no sexual characteristics... but I digress.  Once I was healed the demon nursing me, bound me once more in chains and brought me to Death and his visitor.  "I am not giving you a choice." the woman spoke to my tormentor with a cold firm tone.  I looked up to her, and she smiled at me, almost a motherly manner.  "She sacrificed herself out of love to another, she doesn't deserve this sort of eternity."  Death barked out a laugh and replied, "Its not about what she deserves it is what she owes me."  Suddenly he glared down to me, and wrapped his fingers in my hair, jerking my hair back so I was forced to look at him.  "Die again little one, and there is nothing on earth, heaven or hell that will save you.  You allow yourself in my domain again and I will kill that infernal cat, as well as your beloved husband... "  He then threw my body at the woman who wrapped her arms around me, and we disappeared.

The next thing I knew, I heard someone sobbing.  I moved closer to the sound, unsteady suddenly.  Looking down, I had hooves, and.. a tail.  Shaking my head, I moved closer to the source of the crying, and found Jaco, who looked at me, almost in horror.  After a brief, conversation, I took off back home.  It wasn't long till I discovered, what I had become.  My skin as black as the knight, with my goddess's blessing scrawled across it.  Horns, ornate and beautiful... I was a demon, again.  From angel to demon.  I was back.

The end of an era,of a legend...

Denenthorn killed Blue.  Strange way to start a journal entry, but it is still forefront in my mind.  She came to visit, as she has done before.  I do not know WHAT crawled up my father's ass, but he came out, being all omnipotent as usual...then attacked her.  The battle wasn't as long as I expected, and the outcome, was horrible, in my eyes.  I watched him rip out Blue's heart, then force her into an angelic being, much as he done me.  I never seen it so clearly as when it happened in front of me.  I suppose I shouldn't have been sooo upset, but it was Blue, his family, my family... I did manage to collect some of her blood, so that was a plus, I suppose.

This event stuck with me since it happened.  Granted, Blue was not an innocent, not by any means.  Tales of the terror she caused, she carried are still legendary.  I remember her attacking Aricelli when we had to go rescue a Reck from the pit, and I remember threatening me the first time I approached the pit by myself.  But for Denny to destroy her, then force her into another being.... I .. I am unable to understand exactly why.  If he wanted to kill her he should have, but to force her, without her choice, into an angel?  What makes him so powerful, so absolute?  How is he the alpha and omega?  When did he become our creator to decide who lives, dies, and how they spend their time on this earth?

It was these thoughts that plagued me for the next weeks.  Everytime I slept I seen him ripping Blue's heart out, I seen her transforming into an angel.  Everytime I seen Denny, I just wanted to tear into him, make him hurt like he has hurt others, make him hurt for making me what I am.  But I can't.  I cannot destroy that which created me, I can only leave it.

So I turned in my bandanna... I left the church.  Miza cried, I cried.  The first, true family like thing I have belonged to in a long time, and I abandoned them, left them to fend for themselves.  I had so many regrets... I don't deal with guilt well.  So I did the only thing I could do, I started searching for merc jobs, doing anything to keep my mind occupied.  It was while doing this, I spoke to Sandra... my conversation with her made her think I was well suited to becoming a shadow again, I just shrugged it off and went on my way.  But her words stuck with me for the next few days.  So I gave in and went back, speaking to Kahlia.  She gave me a task to prove myself, and I did it, within a couple of days.

So I was welcomed back.  The location has changed, the family has changed, the laws... but the vows remain the same as does the freedom.  Been keeping it under wraps though, so much easier to fuck people over when they don't know who you really are.

The storm is coming...

Something was wrong.  I knew that as soon as I seen Xion.  Physically, he was different, completely.  But since he had bound me to him when I was a vampire, and he was a demon, I could recognize him whether he looked like Xai or not.  He approached me... and I couldn't... feel him.  There was no essence about him, no... aura to speak of.  I managed to capture him, and forced my way into his mind, his memory.  I searched for what was wrong with him, and when I found it, I wanted to stick my boot so far up his ass, he'd been coughing up leather for a week.  He raped, a succubus.  Of all things for him to rape... I say rape because in his memory she told him no and tried to run, and he captured her then forced himself on her.  She even said what she was... had he been himself, I would have kicked his ass, but as it was, I needed to help him more at the moment.

I made sure Xai was secured, and opened a portal, stepping into my grandfather's domain.  It was the first time I ever went there willingly, yet he was still angry to see me.  "Child, how many times do I have to tell you, I don't want you here!" he boomed as soon as he saw me.  My shoulders went up in a shrug as I tucked my wings close to my back.  "I did not die this time." I offered as I begin to chew my lip, growing uneasy being near him.  He let out an exasperated sigh and motioned me closer to his throne, his bony fingers coming up to pinch the bridge of his nose.  "No one else gives me this much trouble, no one else DARES to ask ANYTHING of me... yet you, you are a spoiled brat.  Seiphere was much too lenient with you when you were his, and now your 'father', as you call him, should really teach you some humility."  I shrugged again as I stepped closer, for the first time actually taking in his throne room.  It was fitting, I suppose for Death.  Skeletons, pretty succubi, spikes and chains.  But I was in hell after all, it was to be expected.  Once I was close enough to him, I looked up to his face, taking a breath.  "I came for Xion's soul." I told  him, faking a bravado I didn't feel.  "One of yours took it."

"Oh and you think you will get it?" he asked me, his eyes black as coal as he glowered down at me.  "He is the reason you and I are related.  He is the reason your soul is no longer in my possession."  At that my eyes narrowed, and I took a step closer to him.  "No, grandfather.  Seiphere is the reason  you were cheated out of my soul."  "Yes, but why did Seiphere have your soul?  Why were you in his presence?  What made you flee that house of leeches to be at your Sire's side?  It was because this, Xion, fucked up your mind, and opened you to an entirely new world of darkness no?"  His rotting lips curled in a smile as I stepped back, growling softly at him, seeing his twisted logic.  "I forgave him for that, and I want his soul back..." I answered him, my chin lifting in defiance.  He laughed at me and curled his finger up, beckoning me closer, his other hand suddenly grabbing a crystal from the air.  The crystal was grey, cracked, and looked busted from the inside.  "Your, Xion's soul is damaged child.  I only have what the succubus didn't digest of it.  You can't put a damaged soul back in a mortal body."  I stepped back to him, looking at the dirty jewel in his hand, a frown appearing on my face.  "Savannah.." he said softly and my attention immediately went back to him, having never heard this tone from him before.  "You will die, again, child."  His words held no regret in their tone, nor any sadness.  It was a statement from him, nothing more, nothing less.  "The fates have deemed it so.  ANd when you die, your soul will be mine, in it's entirety.  Not your ridiculous emotional ties to Denenthorn, nor your silly human feelings for the others will save you.  You will be my prisoner, for eternity, so pick your next death wisely."  WIth that he tossed the stone at me.  As I caught it, I shrugged.  "Life's a bitch anyways right?"  He nodded and flicked his wrist, and with that I was back in the attic of the church, with the stone and Xai.

I knelt next to Xion, all the affection and love I had for him rushing to the surface as I did.  As I rolled the stone over and over in my hand, it begin to glow, but with a broken sort of light.  Tears rushed to my eyes as I examined it, whispering to it.  A small voice in the back of my head told me, "fix it, with yours..."  I was unsure, how to do it, if I wanted to do it.  I just wanted him back to how he was.  The stone made the decision for me.  My hands begin to glow the more I played with the rock, and the light begin to seep into it.  I felt as if part of me was going with the light, but if it would save Xion, I would do it.  I didn't care... So few in this world I care about like I do him.  Suddenly the rock left my hands, and buried itself in Xion's chest, causing no wounds, more like it had simply faded into him, and I drifted off, sleeping.

It's been too long...

He's watching me, he never stops.  Since I have come back, I constantly feel like I am being hovered over... watched, being slowly driven mad...  He was coming for me.  I knew this...

I tried an experiment.  I mixed holy holy water with my blood...  It turned black.  I was alarmed so I went to where I knew the Coven was operating until their shop reappears, and had Miss Russ examine my blood.  When she told me her results, my heart stopped.  Her diagnosis?  I was part demon and part angel.  Both and Neither...  Russ offered to help me expel this other side.  That went well.  In the middle of the ritual, Spectre showed up and decided to play with my body, bending and breaking it after Rawls disrespected him... Showing him and Russ exactly what he was capable of.  After he played, he left, leaving me a bit more broken, physically and mentally.  His presence seems to infect my mind, my soul... the pain he gives is dangerous... Especially for me.  Does he know, no.. he can't possibly know..

He came for me again... I know better than this, I KNOW I shouldn't tap into those powers, but I couldn't help it... couldn't stop it.  Malika and I were torturing a demon that violated her, and I just wanted him to pay, wanted him to hurt... and that summoned Him... made him aware I was vulnerable... He appeared, and dug his claws into my chest and kidnapped me out of the very place I was most safe at... the church..

I came to, in a dark place.  That is a very disorientating feeling... waking up in darkness, unable to see, or feel anything.  I ran my hands over my body, my clothes were intact other than the shred marks his claws had made, my wounds were healed.  Slowly I stood and extended my hands, walking forward until I hit a wall.  I followed that wall until it connected with another, then another, then another.  My heart sank once I had walked all four walls.  There was no door, no opening.  Suddenly a light appeared above me, and I seen him, standing in the middle of the room, simply staring at me.  I pressed as close to the wall as possible, hissing at him, tensed for a fight.  He laughed and snapped his fingers, and suddenly I was at his side, his hand grasping my chin.  "Say, not a word." he said coldly.  "You, can end this..."  His hand released my chin, and moved to my neck, running his thumb over where my carotid artery was.  "All you have to do, is die... then I will not bother you, your twisted love for that demon will go away, all the internal angst, it will all be gone."  His voice turns soothing as keeps rubbing my neck.  "No..." I whisper, and like a flash the room goes dark, and suddenly there are things ripping and tearing at me.  "I SAID TO SHUT UP!" His voice booms all around me as dozens of hands, teeth, nails, all digging in me... With a soft whisper, I find my weapons and begin to fight back.  I can see ... awful things in the light of my gunfire but I keep firing, keep slashing...

Then I'm back in Toxia, no reason why, no reason how... just the whispers in my brain.

The voices, they won't stop, the nightmares won't go away... I've quit sleeping in mine and Tora's bed because my tossing and turning was keeping her awake, whether she admits to it or not.  I catch a nap or two here and there, but for the most part I stay awake.  His face, his voice, he haunts me awake or asleep... I feel like I'm falling into the rabbit hole, spiraling out of control.  He gives orders, I refuse.  He wants me to hurt, to hunt.  Kill kill everyone that I care about.. Drive them away to save them... I can stop this I can end this, all I have to do is die die death darknes...

Blast from the past...

Seiphere... my vampire and demonic sire, my former... whatever you want to call him, is back.  The day I walked into the church and seen him... it was as if my world started to spin in the other direction.  It had been so long since I had seen him, spoken to him, touched him...  It does not escape my sense of irony that after I had a  conversation with his creator that he reappeared in Tox...  His reappearance however has added to the confusion that is, what seems to be lately, my brain.  As a vampire emotions were simple.  We didn't have them. As an angel now... I do have them and they are hateful things.  Shea and I have gotten close... he stood watch over me when Rollo and Russ brought me back to the church.  He guards me when Denny's not around... and... feelings have developed but with Seiphere back... its an entirely different ballgame.  Seiphere has changed, he's more.... well he's not trying to rip my eyes out or drain me like he used to.  He seems to enjoy my company as well as my very.. presence.  So I am torn between an Angel and a Demon...  Denny would rip me a new one, and probably a few more if he found out I was even on speaking terms with Sei.  His ... kill all demons order has never been as hard to follow as it is now.

Speaking of Denenthorn, he is back.  I was overjoyed to see him back and in one piece.  I actually hugged him... before realizing what I was doing and stopped.  He angers me though... he acts as if Spectre is undefeatable.  Everyone, even Satan himself has a weakness.... I feel like he's keeping something from me.... but I cannot force it out of him, nor do I want to.  the being that fixed my wings told me more than Denny did about Spectre... I may be able to defeat him, but if I do... I may risk dying myself and I do not think Death will let me back again.  It was weird, that thing that took over Denny's body.  He followed me, spoke to me, but only me... however he granted me my immortality back... thats all that really matters to me.

Since I've gotten back to my tasks, and my duties on the council, my days are a little busier, but not as full as I would like.  The Shadows are eerily quiet... I haven't seen Jan around so I suppose he left them as well.  I see Esso, and Sandra... as well as a couple of the newer darkie darks, but the house as a whole I feel is falling.  I suppose this is supposed to give me a sense of pride and accomplishment, but it doesn't.  What is light without darkness to balance it out?

Something strange has been happening since I came back from Spectre... I feel more restless than normal.  Its like I have an itch I can't scratch, like I'm suddenly trapped in my skin.  Theres also almost a dull.... thrumming through my body constantly.  A dull ache perhaps?  But not painful, just...  letting me know, it wants something I am not providing it.  Theres a voice inside my head, that repeats itself over and over, telling me what I need... but its really more of a buzz and if I concentrate enough, it goes away, sometimes.  I need pain... it tells me that, but it wouldn't be appropriate for a Herald, Denenthorn's daughter to boot, to go seeking a shadow to hurt her like I used to do so long ago.  So I fight it.  The days stretch on...

Spectre came a'knockin

((((((((((((((WARNING THIS BLOG CONTAINS GRAPHIC VIOLENCE!!
And I will be editing, tweaking things as the story develops...))))))

He was there... almost as if he was waiting on me as I started toward my room. There in the lobby. I shook it off and got on the elevator, quickly locking myself in my room. Once there, I begin to pack my bags, I was leaving the next morning. Once done, I hopped in the shower, shrugging off the illusion I used to hide my wings.

There was a knock at my door. Wrapping a towel around myself, I curse, and try to open the door at an angle so that I can hide my wings. No one . was there. Huffing I turn around, and suddenly I find myself face to face with him. The one Denny warned me about. "Hello daughter of Denenthorn." he smiled. I hissed at him and tried to ease around him toward the window. "Hello Spectre...."

"Ah I see the dear prince explained who I was." he laughs as he takes off his hat and does a sweeping sort of bow in front of me. "Not really," I reply, making my towel turn into a robe, then I tighten the rope around it. "Just warned me about some skinny fuck I should avoid." He laughs at me and leans against my door, waving his hands making bars appear over my window. "Perhaps he should have kept you under his wing then..." He looks me over, and I feel the urge to take another shower. "Pretty little girl like you should not be alone..."

I huffed and turned away from him, the robe melting into jeans and a sweatshirt, covering as much as my body as possible. "Fuck off." I growl, and again he laughs. "Oh, yes, he really should have kept you in his nest... " Spinning around I summon my blades, growling out a challenge. Once more, he laughs, and then my world went dark.

I came to, chained to a table. I tested them, and they burned into my flesh. My wings are somehow in the table, and I'm naked. Spectre walks in with a sheet, and covers me to my neck with it. "Tsk tsk angel." he says. "Can't be showing the naughty bits to your parents now can you?" At the word parents I raise my head. "Parents are dead fucker... " I mutter. "Savannah... " said another voice from one of the shadowy corners of the room. Immediately my head whips toward the source and I can't believe it.

My parents. I can't speak, I can't move. Tears begin to well in my eyes as I stare. "My darling girl..." my mother cries out and runs to me, wiping the tears away, my dad directly behind her. SObs begin to wrack my body, and I struggle harder against the chains, wanting nothing more than to wrap my arms around them. As the smell of my burning flesh fills the room, Spectre speaks. "Savannah..." he says softly. "Your parents are so forgiving, I'm jealous."

"Forgiving?" my dad asks looking at him. "What ... do you mean?" Spectre smiles at my parents. "Well your 'darling' girl here is the reason you died... isn't that right Savannah?" He turns his yellow eyes to me and I shake my head looking to mom and dad. "No... no I never wanted you two to die.. you believe me right? I mean I never would have said no if I knew...." I choke off my words as I begin to sob harder, the tears streaming. Both of my parents look at me horrified. "Thats right.." my mom says softly. "I remember now.. I begged you Savannah... begged you to let us come stay with you... you said no."

I shook my head even more furiously. "no.. please... I didn't know... please.. if I had known... I love you." I cried out then screamed as I seen them begin to age before my eyes. their flesh beging to flake off, as they kept staring at me, accusing me of their deaths. I literally watched them decompose before my eyes, their accusations echoing in my ears. "Lovely parents..." Spectre said. "Too bad you killed them eh?" He shrugged and stripped the sheet off my body, laying it over their remains. I can't speak, the sobs cutting off anything I could or would save to redeem myself. Besides, what redemption is there for one that killed their own flesh and blood?

As I lay there, spectre stepped closer to me, putting a hand on either side of his head. "Renounce your creator." he said coldly, "It will be all the much better for you if you do... curse his name and you'll walk away now..." I shook my head no, unable to speak. He smiled at me, such a cold, heartless grin he had. Tilting his head down, I thought he was going to kiss me, and I felt the bile rise. But instead he kissed my forehead. "Then he will see your fate." he whispered, and clasped my head between his hands. Suddenly I seen Denny, at his desk reading. I screamed for him to run, something but spectre laughed.

"Oh no luv.." he said laughing as he stepped back around my body. "Save your breath, you'll need it angel." I couldn't see what he was doing, but shortly he returned with a length of wire and walked around to my head. I could feel his hands on my wings. His fingers started at where the bone met the skin, and he gently ran his hands down the length of them. "See... since you won't curse HIM... lets try a little test... lets see if I can get you to not curse anything yeah?"

He begin to wind the wire around my wings, threading it through my feathers. He then dropped a cloth over my head stating I couldn't see what he was doing. It was a surprise. I could hear him step away from me, then there was a slight bit of pressure where he had wrapped the wire. "Alrighty princess." he almost cooed as he pulled a chair or something next to me. "The more you scream.. the more Denny will hear you. BUT... the more you scream... the more your wings will break..." He lifts the cloth up and smiles at me. "Doesn't that sound like fun?" Suddenly he stands back up, and walks away, leaving me to my thoughts for a bit. Again I test my binds, and once more the smell of burnt flesh fills the room.

I do not know how much time passed, but he returned, with a rolling tray. I could hear metal bouncing against metal, so I'm sure he had the tray full of tools. "Are you sure you won't renounce your maker? Curse your creator?" he asked as he bent over, his head inches from mine. "Fuck.." I answered drawing out the word, "You." He shook his head. "Not right now..." he said and pulled his first contraption out, forcing my mouth open and shoving it in. It was the same tool that Denny had used on the demon that we tortured. It forced my mouth open and held it there. "SInce you won't use that tongue for what I want you to, you don't need it." He then stuck what looked like a large pair of pliers in my mouth and gripped my tongue pulling it out. Using his free hand, he reached back, pulling a scapel from the tray. He then slowly and methodically removed my tongue, taking what seemed like forever to do it.

Of course I screamed... someone taking so long to do something so quick. The moment I did though, I heard something behind me click, and there was a tug, my wings being forced to bend away from my body. I stopped but was sputtering blood from where he had cut my tongue, the wound was pouring, aided by the fact that my heart was racing a mile a minute. I spit blood in his face, and he simply wiped it off then grabbed a straw. "Can't let this go to waste." he said then stuck the straw in my mouth, and drank my blood till I could breath again.

Taking that same scapel, he begin to make small cuts and carvings all over my body. That wasn't so bad. I kept my mouth shut, other than to turn my head and spit blood out. He worked for awhile then stepped back, admiring his 'artwork' as he kept calling it. Reaching over, he patted my head, told me he'd be right back, then left the room. He exited out a door, which let in a little light before it swung shut. As soon as he left, I begin to chant, calling the black flame, holy light, whatever I could, forth. I concentrated hard on melting the chains holding me to the table. Suddenly, the chains begin to heat up, faster than I could have done it. They begin to brand my flesh and I screamed. From behind me, the clicking started again, and my wings were pulled further out, and each wing was pulled in a seperate direction. The pressure was near unbearable as they were stretched to the breaking point before I silenced myself.

A cold laugh came from the corner of the room. "Silly girl... did you really thing I'd not take precautions against you? I know EXACTLY what you can and cannot do angel." He held his hand out over me, and the carvings begin to move, twisting my flesh with them. Suddenly my body jerked upward, against the chains, and he pulled his hands back. "Now... you can't do anything." he said nodding his head. "Your magic is bound to your body." "Aye... it is." came a familiar voice. I nearly puked as he stepped in my view. IT was Denny... but just a mirage of him... but it was him just the same. "See princess," Spectre said as he motioned to Denny. "I showed him what I was doing and he wanted to help..." Denny walked around next to my body and looked Spectre in the eyes. “I won't touch her, but... I want to see what you can do.”

I stare at Denny, but his eyes are on Spectre. I can't speak, I can't move... even if I wasn't bound. This man, my father, my protector.. is egging this demon on? Suddenly a sharp pain travels down my arm, and I twist my head in that direction, and begin to scream, even the pressure on my wings can't stop me. He removed the skin on my arm.... all of it. Smiling at me, he dangles the flesh above my nose and I gag, but manage to keep the bile down. I stop screaming in time for the machine attatched to my wings to have twisted the appendages to an awkward angle, almost to the breaking point. Spectre's smile grows wider as he suddenly grows fangs, then lowers his head above my exposed tendons, then begins to feast. Chewing the muscles off of the bones. I can't hold back now, I let out an ear shattering scream, and the machine begins to work again. He continues to eat my arm, exposing the bone and I continue to scream. Suddenly there is twin pains in my back and my eyes roll back as the machine yanks my wings from my back, pulling them completely away from my body. I have had them cut off, cut them off myself once, but this was an entirely new meaning of pain. It felt like he ripped my soul from my body when the machine pulled them off. My entire body begin to thrash against the chains, screams and sobs erupting from my chest.

I felt the blood gushing from my back as a sinister laugh came from Denny. “Good call Eric.” he chuckled then looked at me. His eyes were strangely blank, almost like the glass eyes you see in dolls. “Ye mortal now lass....” he murmured, then looked back to Spectre. “She's uneven too.... I'd do what ye did to her arm to the rest of her body.” Spectre grinned and nodded, before repeating his actions to my other arm. At this point, the edges of my vision begin to blur, and I sent up a silent thanks, thinking I was finally going to die or pass out. But just as unconsciousness begin to claim me, there was a sharp stabbing pain in my left leg, snapping me out of it. This went on for what seemed like hours... Once done with my arms, he started on my feet and legs, first peeling the skin off, then devouring the tissue and muscles underneath it.... every time I'd start to pass out, he'd hurt me somewhere else on my body to keep me awake. As he did his cutting, he replayed every mistake I had ever made. Denny leered over me, saying how unworthy I was to be his creation... How I couldn't even cut it as a Vampire, thats why Stiletto had abandoned me. I felt all my doubts, all the guilt I had ever experienced filling my mind. I wept, the memories worse than what was happening me at the moment. But he begin to focus more on my body then...

He cut me open, pulled my organs out, one by one to show them to me, then placed them on his tray... then peeled the rest of my flesh from my body tossing it in the corner. Slowly he begin to pull my bones apart, one by one, piling them up on the floor as well till I was nothing but a head with a exposed torso. I couldn't scream or cry anymore, my throat raw from the hours of his play. Somewhere during all this, Denenthorn had disappeared, but not before coaxing Spectre to kill me, then bring me back and redo the torture, again and again.... For the first time in my life I prayed that Death would hold onto me this time when I met him...

Finally Spectre seemed to get bored with my compliance and waved his hand, the chains melting away. He stuck his hand in my chest, and ripped out my heart, letting me watch it thump a precious few times before it stopped.... and finally darkness claimed me. My grandfather was waiting for me once I arrived, shaking his head. “You know... you are no longer my family by blood.” he murmured and motioned for me to follow him. “I really should keep you in Hades... if it wasn't for the fact that I value my son's sanity I would...” I shrugged and walked behind him, “When did you stop claiming me as family?” I asked. “The day you chose to undo what my son did, and became that abomination that you clung to for so long. You do know vampyres are truly damned correct?” I chuckled. “Aye, but without your son to teach me his ways... I became just another demonic presence floating around, unguided, unsure.... I knew what a vampire was, and what was expected of me then... so...” Shrugging I stopped as he did, looking at a door. “This is true...” he agreed and looked behind him to me, studying me. “You never did make sense to me... why my son fell in love with you... but then again love isn't something I ever understood.” He held a bony hand out toward the door. “That day you called me forth for that girl, to give up her soul, I took something from you... Lets see if your friend will let me give it back because I truly do not want you in my domain...” Again I snickered and walked through the door reappearing in the room where Spectre remained. He was carving my eyeballs out as we walked in, and seeing us, he popped them in his mouth, grinning and chewing them. I felt ill... but a spirit can't vomit can they? Spectre and Death stared at each other a moment, before Death turned to me. “Savannah, he's going to give you back to Toxia... but.. the curses he has put on you, only Denenthorn can remove them...” I begin to protest, Denny stood there and helped him do this to me.. but Death held up his hand, and I lost the ability to speak. “Learn from this... “ he said softly. “You made a sacrifice for one you loved... and I am repaying that now.... “ With a flick of his wrist, suddenly I was back in my body, and oh god the pain...

Spectre begin to put me back together, taking his sweet ass time of course... I felt everything, every twist, every cut, every pop of my joints he fixed. Once I was back into one piece, he begin to carve again, but this time, he chanted as he did it, and I felt my flesh burn like it was lit with hell fire itself... Chains circled themselves around my wrists and ankles, and I could feel him close. I turned my head to where I thought he was, and he gripped my sockets, “Where you land, you are bound until Denenthorn decides you are worth saving child... only he will be able to remove the marks, the chains, but no one, not even god himself... will remove the memories.” He then placed his hand on my head, and there was a burst of pain, then I fell, landing on concrete somewhere... the last thing I remember was someone saying my name, and I finally got to slip into the blackness where nothing could hurt me.